Drug Rehabs & Alcohol Detox Centers

If Drugs Were Legal This Would Be Their Slogans

posted by: Earl in the Drug Rehab Blog

Lots of legal drugs are very heavily marketed by companys and they all have slogans.

Here are a few marketing slogans for legal drugs.

Anadin drug brand, fast pain relief from headaches, colds & flu
Advertising slogans: Anadin. When only fast will do.
            Nothing acts faster than Anadin.

Excedrin drug, painkiller
Advertising slogan: Excedrin. The Headache Medicine.

Aleve drug brand, pain reliever / fever reducer
Motto: Aleve. All Day Strong. All Day Long.

Bayer Aspirin analgesics
Slogans: The More You Know, The More You Trust Bayer.
     Take it for Pain. Take it for Life.

Midol drug brand for menstrual pain relief
Advertising slogans: All you need is Midol.
            Because your period's more than a pain.

Solpadeine brand, a range of painkillers
Marketing slogan: Solpadeine. Power to hit pain where it hurts.

Paramol Tablets, painkiller
Ad slogan: Paramol. You can't hit pain much harder.

Advil drugs, relief from different types of pain
Taglines: For Better Relief, Advance to Advil!
     Advil. Stronger than pain..

Tylenol drug brand
Marketing slogan: Tylenol. The pain reliever hospitals use most.

Nurofen drug, pain reliever
Advertising slogan: Nurofen. Targeted Relief For Pain.

But what if there was a global brand in charge of marketing of drugs that are not legal?

Here are a few of my favorites

Advertising slogan: PCP. Anything the Hulk can do you can do better.

Krokodil. For those who don't feel comfortable in their own skin.
Krokodil: It's like having syphilis, but without all that risky sex!

Heroin: Make nap time all the time!
Heroin: Whatever doesn't kill you, wasn't strong enough.
Heroin: It's not like you really need possessions or friends anyway.
Heroin: the only "fix" you will ever need again... EVER...
Heroin: its not like you really had plans for the rest of your life anyway
Heroin: A million hugs followed by a superpowered kick to the balls
Heroin: why feel emotions when you can blissfully melt away?

Ketamine: Start your day with Special K!
Ketamine: Why let horses have all the fun?
Maybe she's born with it? Maybe it's Ketamine!

MDMA - Because loving everyone you meet is impossible when you're sober.
MDMA - Because you've always wanted to know how to dance
MDMA - why not love EVERYTHING
MDMA - Because clenching your jaw is just a like dance in your mouth.
MDMA: Love thy neighbor...and thy mailman...and thy butcher...and thy dog...and they carpet...and thy...
MDMA: it's impossible to tell you look like an asshole if everyone tells you they love you.
MDMA - grinding your teeth has never felt so good!

Nitrous: womp womp womp womp womp

Salvia:Gone for 60 seconds

LSD, Acid, Shrooms
LSD: Why read the slogan when you can be the slogan.
LSD: now you see
LSD: remove the filter
LSD: Makes music taste more colourful than the floor.
LSD: A slogan is pointless because you won't understand the reference until you've tried it
LSD: ponder life's greatest questions, or laugh at the melting wall!
Acid: You've tried reality, now try acid.
Acid: Taste the music
Shrooms: Take a ride on the space-time continuum.
Shrooms: Be all that everything can be.
"Mushrooms, because sometimes you just want to laugh for 8 hours."

Bath Salts,
Bath Salts : Taste your buddies

Cannabis: the drug against wars
Cannabis: because... Wait what were we talking about?
Marijuana: because, like, you know, why not man?

Adderall: time to learn some calculus.
You can`t pass them all without Adderall
Pass them all with Adderall!
Adderall: Say good-bye to procrastination!

Crystal Meth,
Meth: Only one more sleep till Christmas...
Meth: Because Life is Worth Staying Up For
Meth: Once tasted forever in love
Meth: As seen on TV!
Meth: Who needs sleep?
Meth: Who needs teeth?
Meth: Who needs money?
Meth: Lose weight, without all the diet and exercise!

Cocaine: relive the excess of the 80s with rambling narcissism of today!
Cocaine: Ride that White Pony Your Parents Never Bought You for Christmas
Cocaine - Tonight, you're social
Coke: Betcha can't snort just one

Crack Cocaine,
Crack Cocaine: just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you
Crack - isn't it time you see what all the fuss is about?
Crack: You'll be back

DMT: hffpgewip[fhuewipyf
DMT: ------------

If you liked our marketing slogans for illigial drugs and have one to add please email info@localrehabs.com and we will add it to this page.